when they're gone

Chichay crying realizing that her grandfather is dead

While watching the popular TV show "Got To Believe in Magic", my son asked why the character known as papa bear cried which made the other people also cry. That, given the fact that papa bear said that the dead Lolo Isko didn't want anyone feeling sad upon his death.

It made me think why we do cry when someone dies. For one, I myself cries so much when someone I love dies. Sometimes, even just someone I know.

I answered my son's question by saying that the characters weren't able to help themselves. They just had to let go of their emotions.

Crying doesn't always mean that we are sad. Especially not during deaths. Based on my personal observations and experiences, crying when there's someone who's dead means differently for each person.

There are those who cry because they are paid to do so. They are called the professional mourners. They are hired to cry and represent the feelings of Chinese families who are not able to cry during wakes.

There are those who cry because they sympathize with the family and loved ones of the dead. They feel the sorrow of others as if they are the ones who lost someone dear.

There are those who cry because they are truly saddened by the loss. It could be that the dead is someone really special and loved them. They have yet to accept that they will no longer be with that person because death has separated them completely. Somehow, I still feel that way about my grandpa who passed away 10 years ago because I regret the fact that I did not show him how much I loved him.

Lastly, there are those who cry because they are very happy. They are happy that the person's death has brought him or her peace. In belief that there's life after death, they also believe that the death of one person is the gate to heavens and everlasting life. They are also happy remembering the life of the person who was once a part of their lives.

Whatever the reason is for crying when there's death, I guess it doesn't really matter. In the end, we should all face reality. Death is inevitable, so we should celebrate life while we still can. After all, the dead won't see whether you cried or laughed when they're gone.